LISTEN to me reading this post here:
Or scroll down to READ it (+ there’s a conversation between me and author and Womancraft Publishing founder Lucy H. Pearce at the end of the post for you to watch…)
Midlife is a time that often asks us to sit with deep questions.
What's truly important?
What do you really want out of this short and precious time on Earth?
What's the story you're telling yourself that's fundamentally untrue?
What do you need?
I disappeared from here for a while to sit with these questions and to feel into the answers that feel right for me now, in this late-forties period of my life.
And do you know what?
The result has rather surprised me.
The answer to my questions about calling and what I truly need - and it goes against all the sage advice about giving yourself more s p a c e during perimenopause - was to get a job.
And so I have.
Now, before I go on - I acknowledge my fortune in this being a choice. While neither my husband nor I come from particularly middle-class backgrounds - we both were brought up with a certain amount of economic precarity - we're in a position where I don't have to work in full-time paid employment unless I want to.
And so I've returned to a part-time, fixed-term role in university administration.
(Fear not, I am still writing ✍️ I have four different book ideas on the go! 📚)
After leaving paid employment in 2016 for the seeming liberatory paradise of the world of self-employment I’ve finally looked myself in the eye and recognised I’m not suited to the hustle of the entrepreneurial life. It worked for me for a while when I was teaching yoga and meditation, but not any longer.
My calling is to touch hearts and minds through the written word.
And, quite simply, I’ve found that burdening my creative gifts with the need to make a living from them was crushing them.
I know some people can juggle both. I can't. Not in this late-stage capitalist survival-of-the-savviest landscape where marketing ability too-often eclipses talent. And not while I navigate the soul forge that is the peri/menopause rite of passage.
And - to be frank - spending nearly all day every working day on my own in my head wasn’t doing me too much good. Turns out this highly sensitive introvert needs to be around people sometimes and feel part of a team - who’d have thought it, eh?!
So, I'm protecting my sacred creative calling by giving it the space to breathe and develop in its own way and at its own pace, unburdened by any urgent need to generate income from it.
(Though don’t get me wrong - I love it when people buy my books or get my meditation resources! 😉)
And so returning to the world of the workplace is the way I am giving myself space through perimenopause … I'm following my own advice after all!
But I’m doing so in a way which suits me, my needs and circumstances, and my soul's callings.
I think there's a lesson in midlife discernment in there for us all…
Welcome to Another Way To Live…
And so I'm changing the focus and regularity of this letter.
Did you notice the name change?
It’s now called Another Way To Live.
Because this is what drives me to share what I share - whether it’s been through teaching, writing books or creating meditation resources.
What I offer you is fundamentally about exploring another way to live: one which rejects toxic patriarchal ways and conditioning and embraces a soulful, more fulfilling way of life rooted in reverence of your own cyclic nature, the seasons of life and compassion for yourself and all living things.
And so this is what I’ll share about.
As before, there’ll be thoughtful perspectives, reflection prompts, practices and other helpful resources to gently guide you to greater self-understanding, inner peace and purpose…
…Ways to nourish your soul during these discombobulating times we find ourselves living through.
As to when I’ll post - well, befitting my own perimenopausal wonky cycle, it’s likely to be somewhat irregular!
So you’ll receive a letter from me when I feel I have something of value to share with you.
But generally my posts will be arising from my own lived experience and cultural observations about midlife, living cycle wise and being kinder to yourself.
🔥🌀💞
If you’d like to read more about this change of focus then you can do so HERE.
How does that sound? Leave a comment if you feel called to, or drop me a line.
Until next time…
Wishing you the blessings of fierce + tender self-compassion,
Stella x
In conversation with Lucy H. Pearce
I recently featured on the Womancraft Book Club talking about my experience of living cycle wise and writing Cycles of Belonging.
Watch it here:
Thank you so much for being here.
If you wish to support my work then why not buy me a herbal tea or decaf coffee HERE 🫖🍵☕🙏🥰💞
I really needed to hear this. Thank you for sharing :-)